Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Reader's Mail...


ladun, I need sincere advice from your readers on my  issue. I have been married for 2 and a half years with a child and I'm 5months pregnant expecting my second child. I'm really unhappy in my marriage - I think its leading to depression, I don't get to sleep @ night and I cry a lot. My marital problems started practically on the second week after I got married. Click to continue reading...


He was a different person before we got married, he was sweet, understanding and caring. But after we got married I saw a different side of him. He was my first and only sexual partner. I discovered I had an std 2weeks into our marriage, it was really a difficult time for me and that same time he was seriously toasting his colleague in the office. I have since forgiven him. He has really hurt my feelings deeply in the first one year of the marriage, I remember when he asked a girl to snap her nude pix and send it to him on his bb, and many more hurtful stuffs he did in our 1st year of marriage. After he lost his job, I ve been the one taking care of everything around the house. He is currently running his business and which I still support him that I ve nothing left of my salary for myself. He comes home late, he doesn't help me around the house - instead he helps to scatter. I work a 8am to 5pm job,I have no one helping at home, I pick our child up from daycare on my way home. The only time I rest is bed time, while he has a lot of time, which he prefers to use on the internet and he likes going out late at night. He doesn't take me to his functions, recently his cousin’s wife put to bed and I had parcelled some things for her but my husband didn't take me along he only collected what I had for them. I feel really sad. I get scared at night when he is away- I don't sleep when he goes for his night outings, when he comes back around 3am I act as if I'm sleeping cos anytime I try to talk to him he walks away. He never talks about anything, we don't gist, I lost most of my friends after I got married. I'm always feeling lonely, all I do when that feelings come is to play with our child. We haven't made love for 5months now, I try initiating it but he said he wants to sleep. Majority of the time he sleeps in a separate room. I think I still love him, I wish my home can be normal for once. I tried talking to him when he was driving me to an atm to get money to buy things for the house, he parked and got out of the car - he said he doesn't want to talk about anything. I have no one to talk to. During the first year of our marriage, I wanted a divorce but my parent kicked against it. I have no support. I am emotionally down, he doesn't even care about my condition-he hasn't even asked how the pregnancy is. That's if he even knows how old the pregnancy is. He seems happy when he talks to people on the fone. Its like a loveless marriage. I miss being loved, begin cared for,making love, discussing with someone. I'm so confused. I don't know what step to take next.This man took away my smiles, joy of being pregnant, joy of having children.I feel lonely and emotionally stressed- can't just stop thinking. I need sincere advice, I need to hear some positive things to move me forward.

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